🌿 Women’s Devotional — Day 214

Learning Love from Christ

📖 “This is My commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you.”
—John 15:12 (NKJV)

Jesus does not simply command us to love one another. He gives us the measure of that love: “as I have loved you.” If I want to understand what biblical love looks like, I do not begin with my emotions, other people’s expectations, or the definitions offered by the culture around me. I look at Christ.

That changes everything.

Jesus loved His disciples patiently when they misunderstood Him. He served them when they were concerned about their own greatness. He corrected them when they were wrong. He taught them truth even when it challenged what they believed. He remained faithful when they were weak. And on the night He gave this command, He was preparing to demonstrate the depth of His love by laying down His life.

The next verse makes the connection unmistakable: “Greater love has no one than this, than to lay down one’s life for his friends” (John 15:13, NKJV).

Christlike love is willing to give itself for the good of another.

For women, that truth can require careful discernment because sacrificial love can easily be confused with having no boundaries at all. We may believe that loving someone means always saying yes, carrying responsibilities that belong to someone else, remaining available regardless of the cost, or allowing another person’s desires to govern our decisions.

But Jesus never defined love as enabling another person’s selfishness or sin.

He served willingly, yet He did not let people’s demands determine His obedience to the Father. Crowds searched for Him, but He withdrew to pray. People wanted Him to act according to their timetable, but He remained governed by the Father’s will. He showed compassion without surrendering truth.

That means saying no can sometimes be an expression of love.

If someone asks me to participate in wrongdoing, love says no. If continually rescuing someone prevents that person from taking responsibility for choices she must make, love may require me to step back. If another person expects something from me that would require disobedience to God, loving that person never requires disobeying Christ.

Yet the opposite danger exists.

Boundaries can become an excuse for selfishness. “Protecting my peace” can become a convenient way to avoid sacrificial love, difficult conversations, forgiveness, or responsibilities God has actually given me. Scripture does not permit me to rename self-centeredness as wisdom simply because the language sounds healthy.

Again, Christ must remain the standard.

Sometimes His love serves.

Sometimes His love confronts.

Sometimes His love waits.

Sometimes His love gives.

Sometimes His love refuses.

But His love is always governed by truth and seeks what is genuinely good.

The women among the earliest Christians had to learn this in very practical circumstances. Following Christ could reshape household relationships, friendships, social expectations, and community obligations. They were called to love people who did not always understand their allegiance to Jesus. They could serve neighbors, care for the suffering, practice hospitality, and honor others without joining practices that violated their obedience to Christ.

They learned that love and faithfulness were not enemies.

We need that same discernment.

Jesus had already told His disciples, “Abide in Me” (John 15:4, NKJV). That is where this kind of love begins. I cannot manufacture Christlike love simply by deciding to become more generous or patient. I need His Word to shape my understanding, His Spirit to produce His fruit in me, and my will to be continually surrendered to His authority.

Knowing Christ changes the question I ask in difficult relationships.

Instead of simply asking, “What will keep this person happy with me?” or even “What will make me most comfortable?” I can ask, “What does faithful love require according to Christ?”

Sometimes that answer will cost me.

Real love always costs Him.

Prayer:
Lord Jesus, teach me to love as You have loved me. Keep me from confusing love with people-pleasing, enabling, or compromise, and keep me from using boundaries or truth to excuse selfishness and hardness of heart. Give me wisdom to know when love should serve, speak, wait, give, forgive, or say no. Let Your Word—not my emotions, fear, or desire for approval—define how I love. As I abide in You, make Your sacrificial, truthful, and gracious love increasingly visible through my life. Amen.